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Local Dad Devastated To Find Out Daughter's New Boyfriend Is "A Great Person"

Local father and person who still reads physical copy of newspaper, John Windelson, was caught off guard when his daughter Sierra, 25, came home with a male who stayed for dinner on Sunday afternoon. John was horrified when the only other person in the room with a penis explained he was planning to attend Stanford in the fall, and hopes to one day help get modern medicine to third world countries.

"My daughter was my only female friend, and ever since she moved out it's been really lonely," John said, his wife sitting next to him.

After the meal was over the young man in question insisted on helping clean the kitchen, and was even spotted saying phrases like, "The world is a better place when we all do our part."

John's wife declined to comment on the matter.

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