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  • Writer's pictureChewe

Aunt Suzie Uploads All Her Photos To The Cloud So That God Can See

After months of writing with no reply, your Aunt Suzie recently went big and uploaded all her photos to the cloud in hopes of a chance to commune with the Almighty Father. Although she graduated from Notre Dame in 1967 with a degree in photography, it does not appear that her talents with film have translated to the digital age.

Aunt Suzie recently returned from her big annual trip to Jamaica for Hedonism II. Although most of those photos didn’t make it to the cloud, she purposefully included a nip slip somewhere amongst them in an attempt to get the man above a little hot and heavy.

When asked for comment, God responded “If I visited everyone who sent me pics, I’d never get to the important things like starting wars, giving children cancer, and keeping Ozzie Osborn alive despite all the strokes. Most of the time they’re sent on accident from the tech illiterate.”

Aunt Suzie, although heartbroken by the lack of God’s love, has found a new love interest with more…carnal desires. Paparazzi following the story snapped some photos of dear Aunt Suzie walking out of a Chippendales Saturday evening with a dashing older gentleman arm in arm.

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