Urbandale, IA- With each passing day, Iowa native Greg Palatine both remembers and forgets that Matthew Dellavedova, NBA legend, is currently a Sacramento King.
“Every time [NBA legend Matthew Dellavedova] comes up I think to myself, oh yeah that guy. What is he up to again?” says Palatine as he leans against the pinball machine of his favorite bar.
Long gone are the headline grabbing days of Matthew Dellavedova. Many people forget how Mr. Dellavedova was paramount in helping Lebron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers to one single championship title. Many people forget, but not Greg.
Greg Palatine of Urbandale, Iowa has the unique ability to experience a single thought in three different forms: past, present, and future. For example, the past- Matthew Dellavedova is an NBA player, the present- Matthew Dellavedova is an old NBA player, and future- I will forget Matthew Dellavedova is an old NBA player.
Experts at The North Central Institute of Psychology describe this feeling as similar to experiencing the plot of 3 Hollywood blockbusters: Memento, Minority report, and 50 First dates. All while maintaining awareness of the situation, like in Groundhog's Day.
The experts from North Central explain that upon experiencing similar yet contradicting memories, small-town Greg finds his brain in a short fugue state. At first small town Greg’s mind feels euphoria at the learning of new and exciting information. Then small-town Greg’s peanut head feels betrayed as it discovers the perceived information is not new, but old and forgotten. Now small-town Greg’s Ego is bruised for having allowed such a flurry of emotions in it's system and it erases any and all memories relating to NBA legend Matthew Dellavedova. This phenomena cannot be debunked due to memory problems as the subject is middle aged. When asked if any studies have been done on him, Greg Palatine admits to tests but replies that doctors were yet to find any cancer up there.